Today’s Agenda
Who can you become?
Good morning! Happy Friday! You made it through the week. I hope that this series has brought some light into your week and motivation to get past your “not yets”. I’ve enjoyed learning about this and relaying everything to you guys, so let’s dig in!
Today, for our main course, we’re gonna see the pinnacle of Augustine’s transformation from someone who was over-indulgent and praying to not be saved immediately to someone who gave his whole life to God.
On the side, we’re going to shift gears a bit. Instead of our normal “paradox” section, we’ll make it our call to action. We’ve been filling our thought bellies with no exercise, which is theoretically unhealthy.
For dessert, we’re going to open up Augustine’s Confessions one last time to see Augustine’s triumphant conversion to a man morally grounded by God.
Take your seat at the table, because Thought Breakfast is served!
Today’s Breakfast
Transformed
At the start of this week, we knew Augustine as the man who begged God for virtue “but not yet.” Over the course of the week, we’ve seen the inner spiritual, psychological, and philosophical turning points in Augustine’s mind that helped him become the man we now recognize. Now his desire doesn’t fight him; he likes the life he once didn’t want “yet.”
What happens after Augustine’s conversion?
He is baptized by St. Ambrose.
He abandons his ambition permanently.
He forms a monastic community.
He becomes radically committed to celibacy not as repression, but as freedom.
His piety becomes gentle, rather than harsh.
He writes Confessions.
He becomes the Bishop of Hippo, although he did not want a position of leadership.
Could you believe these things all happened to a man who was once sexually immoral, overindulgent, and more concerned with feeling good than doing good?
The main point here is that you can’t bring yourself to be better (in any area of your life) by forcing it into being. Although we covered Augustine’s attitude from “not yet” to “now” within a week, he himself didn’t reach his conversion until he was 32 years old.
Restraint is not punishment. Augustine didn’t gnash his teeth, clench his fists, and become good. He evolved as a person until he craved the true good more than what he previously thought was good. He attributes his conversion to one thing: grace. Augustine would not say that he disciplined himself into goodness, but rather that his “will became free when it aligned with God.” Previously, his will had set limits for him. All those pleasures were keeping him trapped in one constant loop of feeling good and then feeling empty.
We can see now how letting go of the ego’s compulsions produces relief, clarity, and a deeper sense of self. From the theological standpoint, Augustine’s will is set free when he allows it to rest in the Good. From a psychological standpoint, Augustine shows us that once the divided will unifies, energy, clarity, and meaning all return.
Burn Those Thought Calories
Integration
As you can see, I’ve retired the paradox section. Rather than stretching our minds with daily paradoxes, we’ll use this section as an opportunity to integrate what we learn into our daily lives. With that in mind, here’s today’s takeaway.
Today, rather than analyzing Augustine… I’m asking you to be Augustine for a moment. We’ve worked psychology and theology into what happened in Augustine’s head, so now it’s your turn.
Sit with these three questions:
What part of your life feels like effort without grace?
What part feels like grace without effort?
What would “alignment” look like instead of striving?
Like we said before: discipline isn’t repression, it’s harmony. Find where you might have division in what you want from life, and ask yourself why it exists. What’s holding you back? Who can you become without this division?
Book Nook
Today, we’ll be reading a passage from Book IX of Confessions that highlights Augustine after his transformation. This is one of the first moments in Confessions where Augustine speaks from genuine rest.
“How sweet all at once it was for me to be rid of those fruitless joys which I had once feared to lose and was now glad to reject! You drove them from me, you who are the true, the sovereign joy. You drove them from me and took their place, you who are sweeter than all pleasure, though not to flesh and blood, you who outshine all light yet are hidden deeper than any secret in our hearts, you who surpass all honor and though not in the eyes of men who see all honor in themselves. At last my mind was free from the gnawing anxieties of ambition and gain, from wallowing in filth and scratching the itching sore of lust.” - Confessions IX.1
This passage is incredibly powerful. It highlights the triumphant joy that Augustine feels after his will is no longer divided. He describes the sweetness of being freed from the desire that once mastered him; a sweetness we all can relate to when we let go of anything that no longer serves us. Before Book IX, Augustine’s tone is marked by longing, struggle, and plea. Here, the turmoil breaks: Augustine is finally restful and joyful.
Where in your life are you craving this kind of rest?
Munch on that for today. I’ve had a lot of fun exploring Augustine with you this week. Have a great weekend and check your inbox on Monday. Next week’s menu is going to be a great one, and I can’t wait to serve it!
New Faces
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That’s it for today.
Remember to stay mindful, smell the flowers, and take it easy.
Chef Ricky - Thought Breakfast
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